Linda writes
 
You will have seen from the Programme that I was intending to read out the reflections – not only of Sarah, but also of Angela and James (Simon’s sister and brother).
 
Sadly, time constraints here at the Crematorium have meant that this is not possible – it would not allow me to do justice to the beautiful Reflections, so lovingly written by Angela and James. So, with their encouragement and blessing, I am removing this time pressure from myself. Their contributions will be posted on to Simon’s Tribute page for all to see and read.
 
There will be a celebration of Simon’s life later in the year – in fact a number of them to look forward to. Simon would like that.
 
Aren’t our children wise. ………In my mind’s eye, I feel I can see Simon smiling at me and saying  - ”don’t stress Mum, just go with the flow”  -  so here goes, Simon.
 
Firstly, I want you  -  and everyone to hear what Sarah has written about you – the love of her life. 
 
She has asked me to read this out for her:-
When we got married, Simon said in his speech that he was marrying his best friend. This was so true. Like two peas in a pod. Simon had an active, playful and sometimes surreal sense of humour that matched mine. He made up new lyrics to songs and theme tunes that we used to sing together.  Also, our own language and phrases, many of which somehow made their way into the Paddington Bear film. He was convinced the writers were listening in.  We were different too, like two sides of the same coin. These differences complimented each other  -  like our music experiences, with his in the pop world and mine in the classical. Simon had an encyclopaedic knowledge of music as many friends have remembered, and a love and acceptance of all music no matter what, as long as it was good. 
We got on so well, most of the time. Like all marriages there were disagreements, Simon would get wound up, but he would always say  ‘I’m just trying to help’.  He was a perfectionist  -  to make life better. Simon’s influence will stay with me. 
 
His favourite song was Beautiful Freak, by The Flaming Lips, which he said was about me. My favourite song about him ? I will always hear the ‘Game of Thrones’ theme and think of him and the alternative lyrics. But Ace of Spades is my best memory of him. I will never forget that Simon included the lyrics in his wedding vows. The song became part of our first dance at our wedding  -  after Shania Twain’s ‘Still the one I love’ stopped half way through. This was our song really, and indeed Simon is - Still the one I love. 
He really did love me and I him, We were about to start the next stage of our lives together, something he had been talking about and looking forward to for so long. But sadly it was not to be. I will miss him so much. His strength, his sense of fun and the memories he made will stay with me, forever. 
Thank you,  Sarah. Our hearts go out to you at the loss of Simon. It won’t be easy to learn to live without him. But I know the love you shared will give you courage and help you onwards.
 
 
When I was considering what I would say about Simon – I found myself reminiscing and (almost) talking with him – so this is my letter to Simon
As parents, we will never forget the first time we set eyes on you, our precious first born son. I read somewhere that children are like flowers -  and flowers take many forms. Each one gradually unfurls and reveals itself in all its promise. Each is entirely precious and unique (Each is the best and the only) Each will teach us what it is to love (to be born) to nurture and let go.
 
We watched you grow, Simon – and blossom into the unique wonderful person you became.
We have seen you - and been alongside you -  through all the weather conditions of life. We rejoiced in the Harvest  - when the sun shone for you.
 
Our tears joined yours – and took the place of rain – when the Sunshine failed you. Yet through it all, we have marvelled at your indomitable spirit and your determination to weather the storms of life.
 
This showed itself in spades with how you coped so amazingly throughout your illnesses and conditions
 
You never lost your ready smile, those sparkling eyes and wonderful sense of humour. 
 
You have taught us so much, Simon. We will all miss you so much, especially; your kindness and generosity of spirit. A life well lived – leaves behind a rainbow of memories
 
We have wept at your loss. -  but now you are in that safe place in our hearts - where no storm or pain can reach you. The memory of you will remain with us forever, For now you dwell inside us – as close to us as we are to ourselves.
 
But we won’t look for you only in memory. We know that you would want us to find you in “presence” – taking you with us into the “now” of our lives.
 
We will treasure the six months that you and Sarah lived with us, With no lift -  it was no longer safe or possible for you to climb those four flights of stairs to your home. Your brain cancer was affecting your balance.
 
In our sorrow, we are holding on to all the Blessings - those summer months together - gave to us. The chats, the laughter, the favourite films we watched, the joys of shared cooking.
 
At this point I must tell you that it was not always easy being your sous-chef, Simon. You had very exacting standards – one day, you were giving me a Masterclass and you had a minor melt-down about the spices I had overbrowned.  Later on, you said, “Sorry Mum – its only a curry sauce after all”. I will never forget that beautiful hug you gave me.
 
Even when you were coping with so many debilitating side effects and your balance was badly affected – you found a way to still be involved in your love of cooking.
 
You so enjoyed the fresh air, sitting on the patio, listening to the birdsong and walking with Sarah’s help, around the garden. 
 
On the days when you were not feeling so good and when it was too hot, to be outside, you were busy on your computer. When I suggested you relax – you said you had “projects you needed to finish.”  “What is it”,  I said?
You replied “That would be telling, it will spoil the surprise”.
 
That ‘surprise’ was a beautiful album of your and Sarah’s Wedding Photos - that you had lovingly compiled, to give to us as a Christmas present. You were not here to give it to us in person You and I were both in hospital over Christmas, with Covid Sarah gave your gift to us the day after you died. We will treasure every page and remember how hard you worked to achieve it – regardless of what you were going through.
 
What does this tell us about you Simon? – It tells us that -  right up to the end – your focus was on others - and not on yourself.
 
We are so proud of you and all that you achieved in living out your passion and love of music. You have touched so many lives and your Tribute page is testimony to that.
 
In my eyes this Poem could have been written about you – it’s called THE DASH.
 
 I read of a man who stood to speak
At the funeral of a friend
He referred to the dates on the tombstone
From the beginning …. To the end.
 
He noted first - the date of birth
Then - the date of death - with tears
But he said - what mattered most of all 
Was the Dash  -  between those years.
 
For that dash - represents all the time
That they spent alive on earth
And now only those who loved them
Know what that little line is worth.
 
For, it matters not how much we own
The cars … the house… the cash
What matters -  is how we live and love
And how we spend our Dash
 
 
You spent and lived your Dash so well, Simon
 
BETWEEN YOUR HELLO AND YOUR GOODBYE
THERE WAS LOVE – SO MUCH LOVE
 
Thank you Simon – Rest in Peace.